My boss was telling me how he lit fire at the back of people, how he managed to get people running to get things done. His voice had a touch of proud as well as of making me understand the way things are done. "Nobody will do things at his own, we will have to push them" he said. I tried to make sense out of these lines and tried to correlate how do I work, what makes me do a good job.
I find that I do an excellent job when 'I' want to do it. That means, I have no pressure or force from anybody else (and not even from my mind and body). It is just like I want to do it because that is the right and the best thing to do. The force is from within, and it is not force. It is like you are moving always, only thing is now you are channelised, directed. now you are more relaxed and aware.
What happens when somebody forces some action on me. I do it for soembody else. I do not have nay motivation to do. Only force is fear of not doing, which drives the action. So I do the minimum required.
December 24, 2006
December 21, 2006
Gandhigiri with Munna Bhai
This refers to the article “Nothing Gandhian about it” by Ajit Duara (‘Magazine’, 01/10/2006). I have a difference of opinion over views expressed under the article with respect to the movie “lage raho…..”, as well as on applicability of Gandhian Values. Article mentions that the movie gives a wrong impression about Mahatma Gandhi being a “passive fellow who always turned the other cheek”, “solved problems by saying sorry to people”, “shaming them into better behaviour” and so on. Article further mentions that the Gandhian principles (civil disobedience) works only with civil and law abiding people.
First of all, it needs to be understood that this movie is not a documentary on Gandhi’s life and values. It is only a simplified demonstration that principles preached and practiced by Gandhi seventy five years back to gain freedom for the country, can be applied to our daily life problems and situations. It rekindles the faith in the principles of truth and non-violence at a time when present generation (and even the older generations) has lost the real meaning of these terms.
With regard to the opinions about Gandhi after watching movie, each person can have their own interpretations of Gandhi as a person. Someone totally ignorant about Gandhi can be excused for mistaking Gandhi as passive person. However, those with deep understanding on strength of truth and non-violence, will understand what type of activeness, awareness and courage, it takes to turn the other cheek.
It needs to be understood that it does not amount to surrender to the tyrant. On the contrary, it is a slap on his face with a silent bang. It says that I will not retaliate in your manner, I will do it in my manner and I will continue on my way, whatever you do to me. People try to empty their frustration out, in the name of teaching others a lesson (which never happens) and aggravate the situation.
It should be understood that what is important here is not “taking the slap” but “not to deviate from the right path and action”. Those who think that getting a beating is equal to defeat, have no better purpose in life than to protect their ego, by showing that they cannot be beaten.
Again, saying sorry to people, shaming them into better behaviour and telling truth to scoundrels are only the outward display of basic principle of truth and non-violence. These actions and other similar actions will not work unless the actions are taken with conviction that this is the right thing to do. It may or may not result into change in behaviour of others immediately (may not be as fast as shown in the movie), it definitely gives one the satisfaction of doing right things. And eventually, things do change, as the other person starts seeing the mirror and an inner change takes place. This will not be the case, if he is given a violent reply.
Similarly, in case of elderly gentleman shaming the official, article states that the old man will be laughed at and shall be described as senile. The root of most of present problems is that we are so afraid of being laughed at, that we do not gather courage to take the right step. The person, who is convinced about his actions and does not care about what people think about him, will be successful in this type of active surrender.
It is true that the events have been simplified but if that is not done, it is not possible to fit all those events within the frame of three hour movie sequence. Despite this, director has kept the basic theme alive in all the events. One can show the application of each of Gandhi’s principles and can make a movie out of each of them. However, this movie acts as a ignition to the faith of common people, whose beliefs in basic human values have been crumpled with so called ‘practical approaches’.
One thing that needs to be kept in mind about the movie is that it is just a glimpse, a ray of hope that these principles do work. There is not absolute formula for getting results in these principles and so any manner of application of these principles can always be questioned with logic and reasoning. One needs to catch the basic theme of any principle and than he may apply these principles in life in his own way.
The most disturbing fact about the article is that it qualifies the application of Gandhian principles based on whom you are dealing with and states that these are workable only with civilized and law abiding people. It is shortsighted view about the outcomes from application of these principles, which has made our society to take such limiting views about Gandhian values. In fact, these principles are more relevant while dealing with uncivilized and ruthless people. Results might take time, but this is the only way to get long lasting results, where people change from within.
Considering the recent examples quoted in the article, let us answer, whether Iraquis have been successful with their violent attempts against the Bush regime and is there any hope of success for them with present way of fighting. Had the Jews protested Nazi Barbarism in Gandhian way, it might not have saved them (they could not be saved otherwise also), but it would have definitely shattered the base of barbarism and dictatorship.
It is too narrow a view about the principles of truth and non-violence, that its application is restricted only to the law-abiding ones. It is rather the fear of short term sacrifices that one might be required to make, if he follows these principles. A real understanding of these values will definitely give conviction to anybody that only means which work in long run are truth and non-violence.
Regarding enforcing rules in society, Gandhi would have never advocated strict enforcement of law. He never advocated external enforcement, rather, he practiced and preached taking right action from within. He would have encouraged people to obey law because it is right thing to do for all of us.
Lastly, a true understanding of character of Munna Bhai will reveal that though he is a ‘Bhai’ and does illegal business, from within, he is full of love and care for fellow beings. He knows what is right and understands it in very simple terms. Gandhian Principles actually channelise his energy into more productive outcomes. Let us answer, if this character can be stated as idiot, are the people around us picking up small fights without any purpose, any better.
The movie needs to be taken with an appreciation of the fact that somebody is trying to put the Gandhian Principles back to the place, where they belong to – the heart of common people. These do not belong to the book shelves of libraries or the speeches of great orators. Let us not argue the logic behind the actions suggested in the movie. Rather, let us understand whether the truth and non-violence are right things to follow, and then let’s take actions in our own way. That is the spirit behind GANDHIGIRI.
First of all, it needs to be understood that this movie is not a documentary on Gandhi’s life and values. It is only a simplified demonstration that principles preached and practiced by Gandhi seventy five years back to gain freedom for the country, can be applied to our daily life problems and situations. It rekindles the faith in the principles of truth and non-violence at a time when present generation (and even the older generations) has lost the real meaning of these terms.
With regard to the opinions about Gandhi after watching movie, each person can have their own interpretations of Gandhi as a person. Someone totally ignorant about Gandhi can be excused for mistaking Gandhi as passive person. However, those with deep understanding on strength of truth and non-violence, will understand what type of activeness, awareness and courage, it takes to turn the other cheek.
It needs to be understood that it does not amount to surrender to the tyrant. On the contrary, it is a slap on his face with a silent bang. It says that I will not retaliate in your manner, I will do it in my manner and I will continue on my way, whatever you do to me. People try to empty their frustration out, in the name of teaching others a lesson (which never happens) and aggravate the situation.
It should be understood that what is important here is not “taking the slap” but “not to deviate from the right path and action”. Those who think that getting a beating is equal to defeat, have no better purpose in life than to protect their ego, by showing that they cannot be beaten.
Again, saying sorry to people, shaming them into better behaviour and telling truth to scoundrels are only the outward display of basic principle of truth and non-violence. These actions and other similar actions will not work unless the actions are taken with conviction that this is the right thing to do. It may or may not result into change in behaviour of others immediately (may not be as fast as shown in the movie), it definitely gives one the satisfaction of doing right things. And eventually, things do change, as the other person starts seeing the mirror and an inner change takes place. This will not be the case, if he is given a violent reply.
Similarly, in case of elderly gentleman shaming the official, article states that the old man will be laughed at and shall be described as senile. The root of most of present problems is that we are so afraid of being laughed at, that we do not gather courage to take the right step. The person, who is convinced about his actions and does not care about what people think about him, will be successful in this type of active surrender.
It is true that the events have been simplified but if that is not done, it is not possible to fit all those events within the frame of three hour movie sequence. Despite this, director has kept the basic theme alive in all the events. One can show the application of each of Gandhi’s principles and can make a movie out of each of them. However, this movie acts as a ignition to the faith of common people, whose beliefs in basic human values have been crumpled with so called ‘practical approaches’.
One thing that needs to be kept in mind about the movie is that it is just a glimpse, a ray of hope that these principles do work. There is not absolute formula for getting results in these principles and so any manner of application of these principles can always be questioned with logic and reasoning. One needs to catch the basic theme of any principle and than he may apply these principles in life in his own way.
The most disturbing fact about the article is that it qualifies the application of Gandhian principles based on whom you are dealing with and states that these are workable only with civilized and law abiding people. It is shortsighted view about the outcomes from application of these principles, which has made our society to take such limiting views about Gandhian values. In fact, these principles are more relevant while dealing with uncivilized and ruthless people. Results might take time, but this is the only way to get long lasting results, where people change from within.
Considering the recent examples quoted in the article, let us answer, whether Iraquis have been successful with their violent attempts against the Bush regime and is there any hope of success for them with present way of fighting. Had the Jews protested Nazi Barbarism in Gandhian way, it might not have saved them (they could not be saved otherwise also), but it would have definitely shattered the base of barbarism and dictatorship.
It is too narrow a view about the principles of truth and non-violence, that its application is restricted only to the law-abiding ones. It is rather the fear of short term sacrifices that one might be required to make, if he follows these principles. A real understanding of these values will definitely give conviction to anybody that only means which work in long run are truth and non-violence.
Regarding enforcing rules in society, Gandhi would have never advocated strict enforcement of law. He never advocated external enforcement, rather, he practiced and preached taking right action from within. He would have encouraged people to obey law because it is right thing to do for all of us.
Lastly, a true understanding of character of Munna Bhai will reveal that though he is a ‘Bhai’ and does illegal business, from within, he is full of love and care for fellow beings. He knows what is right and understands it in very simple terms. Gandhian Principles actually channelise his energy into more productive outcomes. Let us answer, if this character can be stated as idiot, are the people around us picking up small fights without any purpose, any better.
The movie needs to be taken with an appreciation of the fact that somebody is trying to put the Gandhian Principles back to the place, where they belong to – the heart of common people. These do not belong to the book shelves of libraries or the speeches of great orators. Let us not argue the logic behind the actions suggested in the movie. Rather, let us understand whether the truth and non-violence are right things to follow, and then let’s take actions in our own way. That is the spirit behind GANDHIGIRI.
December 17, 2006
A Reflection
Read it further, only if you can spend 10 minutes now, otherwise skip it and read it sometime later. For now, be here only. Reduce your speed to minimum and read as slow as possible. These words are only your world, forget everything else. Look at the colour of the page, colour of the words and shape of the words. Now flow with whatever is written here. Do not push or pull yourself. Just free yourself to let go.
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Now go back to this Monday. Remember the day clearly. Look how the day started. Who woke you up? What time it was? Did you wake up with a start? Did you wake up realizing that you have pressed snooze button 4 times? Did you wake up suddenly realizing that you intended only a 2 minute nap? What was the first thought you had when you woke up? Did you feel tense with the thought of things you have to face today? Did you rush to bathroom being afraid of getting late?
OR
Now go back to this Monday. Remember the day clearly. Look how the day started. Who woke you up? What time it was? Did you wake up with a start? Did you wake up realizing that you have pressed snooze button 4 times? Did you wake up suddenly realizing that you intended only a 2 minute nap? What was the first thought you had when you woke up? Did you feel tense with the thought of things you have to face today? Did you rush to bathroom being afraid of getting late?
OR
Did you feel energized when you woke up? Were you happy to start the day? Did you have a smile on the face for the bright day? Do you remember the touch of brush on your teeth? Can you recall the movement of razor on your face? Do you remember the feel of water on your body? Can you recall the touch of cloth on your body?
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Did you rush your vehicle to reach on time? Did you notice your own existence only when you had to stop at signal? How many people did you curse while your drive to office? How many times did you curse the bad road? Did you see the face of your boss while driving? Did you hear his voice while driving? Did it make you accelerate further? Were you thinking about a fight with one of the colleagues? Did the thoughts about office occupy your whole drive?
OR
Did you feel great while driving to office? Did you notice the brightness of the day and the beauty of the sky? Did you notice how beautiful the road is? Did you feel great to be alive with so many beautiful things around? Did you chuckle noticing the stupidity or ignorance of others?
Did you rush your vehicle to reach on time? Did you notice your own existence only when you had to stop at signal? How many people did you curse while your drive to office? How many times did you curse the bad road? Did you see the face of your boss while driving? Did you hear his voice while driving? Did it make you accelerate further? Were you thinking about a fight with one of the colleagues? Did the thoughts about office occupy your whole drive?
OR
Did you feel great while driving to office? Did you notice the brightness of the day and the beauty of the sky? Did you notice how beautiful the road is? Did you feel great to be alive with so many beautiful things around? Did you chuckle noticing the stupidity or ignorance of others?
---------
How did you start your day in office? Did you rush to your table directly after parking the vehicle? Did you cross people, but were in so much rush that could not smile at them? Did you start working on yesterday’s pending things? Did you start working on a report you have to give to your boss? Did you notice something urgent suddenly and started working on it? Did somebody bring you some urgent work and you started working on that? Did you say that ‘I have no time now, come after sometime’ to everybody who came to you? Did you have to rush to something else, while you were trying to complete one job? Were you shocked that it’s already lunch time? Were you shocked that you could not complete even one job since morning?
How did you start your day in office? Did you rush to your table directly after parking the vehicle? Did you cross people, but were in so much rush that could not smile at them? Did you start working on yesterday’s pending things? Did you start working on a report you have to give to your boss? Did you notice something urgent suddenly and started working on it? Did somebody bring you some urgent work and you started working on that? Did you say that ‘I have no time now, come after sometime’ to everybody who came to you? Did you have to rush to something else, while you were trying to complete one job? Were you shocked that it’s already lunch time? Were you shocked that you could not complete even one job since morning?
OR
While entering the premises, did you notice the building of your office, its colour and its grandeur? Did you notice the security person making futile and halfhearted attempt to control the traffic. Did you feel the vehicle taking a wave on two speedbrakers? Did you notice that today vehicles are better aligned (perhaps some guest is expected). Did you notice the green plants you crossed after parking your vehicle? Did you notice the beautiful pavement between the grass lawn? Did you notice people you came across and their faces? Did you give them a sincere smile? Did you plan your day? Did you take inventory of pending jobs, urgent work? Did you prioritise things and took one thing at a time?
While entering the premises, did you notice the building of your office, its colour and its grandeur? Did you notice the security person making futile and halfhearted attempt to control the traffic. Did you feel the vehicle taking a wave on two speedbrakers? Did you notice that today vehicles are better aligned (perhaps some guest is expected). Did you notice the green plants you crossed after parking your vehicle? Did you notice the beautiful pavement between the grass lawn? Did you notice people you came across and their faces? Did you give them a sincere smile? Did you plan your day? Did you take inventory of pending jobs, urgent work? Did you prioritise things and took one thing at a time?
---------
Were you shocked again when it was 6 ‘o’ clock? Did you decide to sit late today again? Did you have any clue what exactly you have done today? Did you add any value to yourself or to your work? Did your actions today make you a better person? How many times did you take tension during the day? What is the count now for people whom you don’t like? Has it increased? Did the day make any difference to your life?
OR
Did you finish your work for the day? Did you get a kick thinking about some of your actions? Did you feel great being here? Did you feel a sense of victory and achievement? How many times and how heartedly did you laugh? Did you feel that you are a better person at the end of the day? Did you learn something new? Did you solve somebody’s problem? Did you feel happy seeing somebody getting out of tension? Did you feel energized at the end of the day? Did you thank universe for being so kind to you?
Were you shocked again when it was 6 ‘o’ clock? Did you decide to sit late today again? Did you have any clue what exactly you have done today? Did you add any value to yourself or to your work? Did your actions today make you a better person? How many times did you take tension during the day? What is the count now for people whom you don’t like? Has it increased? Did the day make any difference to your life?
OR
Did you finish your work for the day? Did you get a kick thinking about some of your actions? Did you feel great being here? Did you feel a sense of victory and achievement? How many times and how heartedly did you laugh? Did you feel that you are a better person at the end of the day? Did you learn something new? Did you solve somebody’s problem? Did you feel happy seeing somebody getting out of tension? Did you feel energized at the end of the day? Did you thank universe for being so kind to you?
---------
While driving back, did you think about the person who screwed your day? Were you tense about the guests who are coming in the evening? At home, did you notice that you are physically with family, but mentally you are at hundred places? Did you lie on the bed, waiting for sleep to come, while lot of unclear things hover in the mind?
OR
While driving back, could you sing your favorite song? Did you feel great thinking about the coming fun in the evening with guests? Did you have a great time with family and friends? Were you so content that you went to bed and did not know when you fell asleep?
While driving back, did you think about the person who screwed your day? Were you tense about the guests who are coming in the evening? At home, did you notice that you are physically with family, but mentally you are at hundred places? Did you lie on the bed, waiting for sleep to come, while lot of unclear things hover in the mind?
OR
While driving back, could you sing your favorite song? Did you feel great thinking about the coming fun in the evening with guests? Did you have a great time with family and friends? Were you so content that you went to bed and did not know when you fell asleep?
---------
Now relax and come back to present. Pause for a moment. Take stock of all your thoughts.
Now relax and come back to present. Pause for a moment. Take stock of all your thoughts.
NOW
DO YOU NOTICE THAT YOU NEVER REALISED THAT THE DAY WAS AS FUTILE AS ALL PREVIOUS DAYS.
OR
DO YOU FEEL THAT IT WAS ONE OF THE GREAT DAYS IN YOUR LIFE AND IT IS GREAT TO BE ALIVE AND ACTIVE.
JUST THINK IT OVER. IS THIS THE WAY YOU WANT TO SPEND YOUR WHOLE LIFE? THE LIFE WILL COME TO AN END ONE DAY. WILL YOU BE CONTENT LIVING LIKE THIS? DO YOU WANT TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE? THEN WHY NOT MAKE IT NOW? LET US TAKE SMALL STEPS TO MAKE OUR LIVES BEAUTIFUL AND ENERGETIC. LET US BE HAPPY AND MAKE OTHERS HAPPY. LET US COME OUT OF FEAR & TENSION AND MAKE THE LIFE AND THIS PLACE MORE LIVELY. LET US CREATE AN ATMOSPHERE OF HAPPINESS AND JOY AROUND. IT WILL MAKE ALL OF US BETTER HUMANS – PERSONALLY AND PROFESSIONALLY.
LET US MAKE A DIFFERENCE
DO YOU NOTICE THAT YOU NEVER REALISED THAT THE DAY WAS AS FUTILE AS ALL PREVIOUS DAYS.
OR
DO YOU FEEL THAT IT WAS ONE OF THE GREAT DAYS IN YOUR LIFE AND IT IS GREAT TO BE ALIVE AND ACTIVE.
JUST THINK IT OVER. IS THIS THE WAY YOU WANT TO SPEND YOUR WHOLE LIFE? THE LIFE WILL COME TO AN END ONE DAY. WILL YOU BE CONTENT LIVING LIKE THIS? DO YOU WANT TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE? THEN WHY NOT MAKE IT NOW? LET US TAKE SMALL STEPS TO MAKE OUR LIVES BEAUTIFUL AND ENERGETIC. LET US BE HAPPY AND MAKE OTHERS HAPPY. LET US COME OUT OF FEAR & TENSION AND MAKE THE LIFE AND THIS PLACE MORE LIVELY. LET US CREATE AN ATMOSPHERE OF HAPPINESS AND JOY AROUND. IT WILL MAKE ALL OF US BETTER HUMANS – PERSONALLY AND PROFESSIONALLY.
LET US MAKE A DIFFERENCE
December 14, 2006
I LOVE - HATE
I HATE IT WHEN I have to deal with degraded people, who have no sense of commitment, sincerity and responsibility.
I HATE IT WHEN I have to deal with people, who keep giving excuses and have no purpose defined for what they are doing
I HATE IT WHEN I have to deal with scared people, whose sole objective is to save their a** from some perceived fear and have no sense of rationality in their actions.
I HATE IT WHEN I have to deal with people who “do not want to get into any trouble”.
I HATE IT WHEN I have to deal with people who are only concerned about using people to get work done, but have never given a thought about their development.
I HATE IT WHEN on asking for some something, you get to hear everything around, except what was required.
I HATE IT WHEN I get half-truths and non-committed answers.
I HATE IT WHEN person giving the information himself is not clear and confident about it, and gives you a vague and ambiguous picture (so that he can take back his words later, if his a** is on fire).
I HATE IT WHEN I have to deal with people, who are ruining their lives “working hard(?) for long hours” and feel guilty when they see others enjoying.
I HATE IT WHEN I need to follow up with people for jobs that they are anyways supposed to do. I end up doing everything, except my own job.
I HATE IT WHEN I have to suffer because of incompetence or insincerity of others.
I HATE IT WHEN instead of working towards one goal, time and efforts get wasted on frequent fire fighting aimed only at saving the a** (for the time being).
I HATE IT WHEN my urge to take up productive actions are hindered because of useless activities.
I HATE IT WHEN I do not get any feedback (good or bad) on my actions and initiatives. The best way to kill any initiative is to ignore it.
I HATE IT WHEN I put a proposal and people accept or reject it, without questioning the rational behind the proposal.
I HATE IT WHEN somebody does not tell me that I have done a bad job or my action/behaviour is not right, even when he/she feels that way.
I HATE IT WHEN I am told that you have not done something properly, without giving any chance of hearing.
I HATE IT WHEN I am told that you have not done something properly, without any detail on what exactly I have done wrong and how can I work on it.
I HATE IT WHEN I am told that you have done a good job, without telling what exactly I have done and how can I capitalize on that.
I HATE IT WHEN I am told that you have done a good job, without telling what and how can I do even better (Because it implies that you do not expect me to get any better).
I LOVE IT WHEN somebody talks passionately about making a difference in the work area and in life.
I LOVE IT WHEN people understand and are excited about the goal for which we are working and have a sense of excitement and joy in working on it.
I LOVE IT WHEN on approaching somebody with a challenge, he/she feels excited and thrilled with the opportunity to apply mind.
I LOVE IT WHEN somebody partners with you in facing a problem and getting a solution. The work becomes so exciting, if we work together towards one goal.
I LOVE IT WHEN people work with full fun without taking things on their head.
I LOVE IT WHEN I have to deal with people, who are open to ideas and talks; the ones who are clear about what they want and make rational choices based on inner voice.
I LOVE IT WHEN I have to deal with people, who are not only responsible ‘workers’, but also responsible human beings, fulfilling their responsibilities towards themselves, profession, family, friends and society.
I LOVE IT WHEN persons meet their commitments or at least inform in advance, if they are not able to do so.
I LOVE IT WHEN I am given operational freedom and independence to decide my way of working.
I LOVE IT WHEN I am given independence to take initiatives and improvements.
I LOVE IT WHEN I am given higher responsibilities, challenges and opportunities to stretch to my maximum limits.
I LOVE IT WHEN I am questioned on my actions, with a purpose to arrive at the best solution.
I LOVE IT WHEN my initiative is rationally questioned to understand its true value.
I LOVE IT WHEN somebody pats on my back, tells me what exactly good job I have done, discusses my strengths and the ways to capitalize on that.
I LOVE IT WHEN somebody kicks me and tells me what exactly bad job I have done, discusses my areas of improvement and the ways to get better result.
I LOVE IT WHEN somebody gives a patient hearing, understands my problems and gives his inputs.
I LOVE IT WHEN people share their experiences and views, which uplifts all involved.
I LOVE IT WHEN seniors share their vision and goals, so that I can align my actions with them.
I LOVE IT WHEN seniors share their concerns, ask for suggestions and involve me in various activities.
I LOVE IT WHEN seniors share their plans on my future development (as person and as a professional) and the way forward.
I HATE IT WHEN I have to deal with people, who keep giving excuses and have no purpose defined for what they are doing
I HATE IT WHEN I have to deal with scared people, whose sole objective is to save their a** from some perceived fear and have no sense of rationality in their actions.
I HATE IT WHEN I have to deal with people who “do not want to get into any trouble”.
I HATE IT WHEN I have to deal with people who are only concerned about using people to get work done, but have never given a thought about their development.
I HATE IT WHEN on asking for some something, you get to hear everything around, except what was required.
I HATE IT WHEN I get half-truths and non-committed answers.
I HATE IT WHEN person giving the information himself is not clear and confident about it, and gives you a vague and ambiguous picture (so that he can take back his words later, if his a** is on fire).
I HATE IT WHEN I have to deal with people, who are ruining their lives “working hard(?) for long hours” and feel guilty when they see others enjoying.
I HATE IT WHEN I need to follow up with people for jobs that they are anyways supposed to do. I end up doing everything, except my own job.
I HATE IT WHEN I have to suffer because of incompetence or insincerity of others.
I HATE IT WHEN instead of working towards one goal, time and efforts get wasted on frequent fire fighting aimed only at saving the a** (for the time being).
I HATE IT WHEN my urge to take up productive actions are hindered because of useless activities.
I HATE IT WHEN I do not get any feedback (good or bad) on my actions and initiatives. The best way to kill any initiative is to ignore it.
I HATE IT WHEN I put a proposal and people accept or reject it, without questioning the rational behind the proposal.
I HATE IT WHEN somebody does not tell me that I have done a bad job or my action/behaviour is not right, even when he/she feels that way.
I HATE IT WHEN I am told that you have not done something properly, without giving any chance of hearing.
I HATE IT WHEN I am told that you have not done something properly, without any detail on what exactly I have done wrong and how can I work on it.
I HATE IT WHEN I am told that you have done a good job, without telling what exactly I have done and how can I capitalize on that.
I HATE IT WHEN I am told that you have done a good job, without telling what and how can I do even better (Because it implies that you do not expect me to get any better).
I LOVE IT WHEN somebody talks passionately about making a difference in the work area and in life.
I LOVE IT WHEN people understand and are excited about the goal for which we are working and have a sense of excitement and joy in working on it.
I LOVE IT WHEN on approaching somebody with a challenge, he/she feels excited and thrilled with the opportunity to apply mind.
I LOVE IT WHEN somebody partners with you in facing a problem and getting a solution. The work becomes so exciting, if we work together towards one goal.
I LOVE IT WHEN people work with full fun without taking things on their head.
I LOVE IT WHEN I have to deal with people, who are open to ideas and talks; the ones who are clear about what they want and make rational choices based on inner voice.
I LOVE IT WHEN I have to deal with people, who are not only responsible ‘workers’, but also responsible human beings, fulfilling their responsibilities towards themselves, profession, family, friends and society.
I LOVE IT WHEN persons meet their commitments or at least inform in advance, if they are not able to do so.
I LOVE IT WHEN I am given operational freedom and independence to decide my way of working.
I LOVE IT WHEN I am given independence to take initiatives and improvements.
I LOVE IT WHEN I am given higher responsibilities, challenges and opportunities to stretch to my maximum limits.
I LOVE IT WHEN I am questioned on my actions, with a purpose to arrive at the best solution.
I LOVE IT WHEN my initiative is rationally questioned to understand its true value.
I LOVE IT WHEN somebody pats on my back, tells me what exactly good job I have done, discusses my strengths and the ways to capitalize on that.
I LOVE IT WHEN somebody kicks me and tells me what exactly bad job I have done, discusses my areas of improvement and the ways to get better result.
I LOVE IT WHEN somebody gives a patient hearing, understands my problems and gives his inputs.
I LOVE IT WHEN people share their experiences and views, which uplifts all involved.
I LOVE IT WHEN seniors share their vision and goals, so that I can align my actions with them.
I LOVE IT WHEN seniors share their concerns, ask for suggestions and involve me in various activities.
I LOVE IT WHEN seniors share their plans on my future development (as person and as a professional) and the way forward.
December 9, 2006
Kissa Kalam Ka
Story dates back to the time when
During last few days, they learnt a new term, Literacy. They were told that if they can write their names, they will become literate. People did not know what it means to write or read, but were in awe about the whole campaign. Loudspeakers declared the importance of being literate. It was told that it will bring more freedom and power to them. The words sounded nice and all were curious to know more.
However, there was nobody, who could answer their questions. Leaders came and made long speeches in praise of literacy. Auto Rikshaws with loud speakers came making various announcements. but nobody told them the meaning of literacy or how to become literate.
There were few enthusiastic youngsters who were very much fascinated with the idea of literacy. Then there were few others who showed no interest. Rest of then were ready to go into any conveneint direction.
So these enthusiasts attended all the speeches and listened to all announcements. They saw all the coloured papers which the volunteers brought with them. They were trying to make sense out of the pieces of information.
One prominent thing they realised during all these days is that there is something called Kalam (Pen), which is used for writing. It is very powerful instrument. Pen is inevitable for writing. People with pen are the literate people.
They could find mention of Kalam in all speeches. One of the volunteers showed them the picture of Kalam in one of the banners, they had brought. It looked great and villagers saw it with awe of unattainability.
Within two months after their first introduction to Kalam, all villagers were convinced that they need Kalam to be literate, most of them even convinced that it is very difficult to get it. Kalam was talked inside homes, among friends, on Chaupal and on every corner. As they talked and wondered about Kalam without knowing what exactly it is, Kalam became more even more awesome and unattainable. People dreamt of having a big Kalam. Childeren made Kalam models with wood and played with it.
Then, the enthusiasts started getting restless. They decided that they will get the Kalam and become literate. They realised that kalam being such an important instrument will require lot of hard work to get. You must sacrifice a lot to earn this instrument. So they worked harder in fields to earn more and to save more. They walked to nearby places in search of Kalam. But as all the places in their reach were no different, so they could not find Kalam there.
Then elections got over and people from capital cities in white dress stopped coming there. Everything came back to the same old way and people started back their old life. Years went by like this but the memory of Kalam remained with them. They could not forget what a precious object it is and they wondered if they would ever get it.
Then one day a young engineer entered
Then somebody brought out the topic of Kalam, as if taking out the precious box buried in the soiled courtyard for decades. Our young engineer was surprised with the reverence people had for Kalam. He remembered something. He had a good collection of pens after being at so many places. He thought it would be a good idea to gift pens to these people as a return gift for their hospitality.
He took out his collection and offered a pen to each of them. People were stunned and surprised. They could not speak a word. They had been waiting to get Kalam for such a long time and it is here suddenly. Is it a dream? Some people became emotional and kept the gift with full gratification. A few were confused – what to do now when they have got it? How is it going to help them?
Our young enthusiast noticed a group in the corner discussing something. They looked concerned. He asked if he can help anyway. One of them got up hesitantly. He had suspicion in eyes.
“This is not real” he said.
“What is not real.”
“This Kalam cannot be real. We know it is a great object and it cannot be so easily available”
“Yes, it is great and it is easily available.”
“No, you think that we are villagers and so you are fooling us with this log of metal. How can we believe you?”
“This is Kalam and it can write and that is the proof.”
He drew a figure and wrote few words on paper. People looked on with curiosity.
“Even my charcoal can do this.” The same fellow started again.
“True”
“So what is great in this?”
“I don’t understand what greatness you are talking about?”
“We were told that we will become literate with Kalam. Can this piece you gave us will make us literate?”
“Yes, but you will have to learn it. And you do not need Kalam. You can lbe literate even with your charcoal.”
“Enough. This person is misguiding us and is equating Kalam with Charcoal. Every person in the village knows, what a great object Kalam is. We have been using charcoal for ages and have remained in the same misery. If you do not have Kalam, better not cheat us with these useless materials.”
“I am not cheating you and I am telling you the truth”
“You gave us a ordinary piece of coal, named it Kalam and trying to become a hero. Why should we believe you?
“See, you want to become literate. I can tell you how you can learn it.”
“We all know that Kalam will make us literate. Why do we need to learn or do anything? Boy, stop fooling around with us and better tell your real motive.”
“I just want to help you.”
“Are you trying to fill our mind with knowledge from your materialistic and immoral world and destroy our great culture? I think, I am getting your motive now.”
Our young man could see the friendly shine in eyes of people around turning into hostile fire. Even people who were happy initially now looked at him suspiciously, if not with hatred. He still tried to convince them that literacy is not a distant dream and not a hard task. It is achievable by learning and discipline. They do not necessarily need Kalam for that. Kalam does not make them literate. Person has to work for it and nobody else can do it for them.
But he realized that with every word of him, people are getting more restless. He was disappointed with the way people had created image of Kalam in mind, without understanding its real meaning and the meaning of literacy.
At last, he found himself helpless and decided to leave with heavy heart. Villagers of
They are still waiting for the KALAM.
The First Wedding Ceremony
There was a man long long ago. Story is about times when human race started to settle down at a place and did not know anything about relationships, marriages, etc. The man was friendly and started making friends in close vicinity. Some were close friends, some were acquaintances and among them he could find his soul mate. It was a new and wonderful experience, getting a feeling of completeness and knowing the void that existed before. Those were the moments of joy and celebrations. And when the joy became overwhelming, he wanted to share it. He wanted to tell everybody how great he feels. He wanted to see smiling and satisfied faces of people who knew him and care about him. He wanted that the joy pouring out from his heart should be shared with others.
So he talked to his better half and they decided that they will announce the decision of living together, in presence of those few well wishers. They sat and discussed about whom to involve in this get-together. They found that their living place is too small to accommodate so many people. So they decided to keep the meeting in the nearby field. They decided that evening time would be better as days are very hot. It came to their mind that people will have to walk two hours to the field and then again go back the same distance. It would be too late for them to prepare dinner after they return. So it was decided that they will arrange for some food at field itself. They also thought that over meals they can have good chat and will enjoy more.
Both of them divided the people to be informed among themselves and invited them personally. Suddenly it occurred to the man that one of his well wishers has gone towards the sea and may not be back immediately. He wanted to inform him, so that he can also join them. The girl suggested that the boy in the neighbourhood knows the way and he can go and give the message. But they also knew that the boy is too forgetful to give the complete message. They knew the wise well wisher is very clever. They took a flat stone and drew the pictures to symbolise the event and asked boy to give it to the wise man.
A day before the event, the couple went to the field. It was too dirty. They thought it would be great if the people feel nice about the place. So the man cleared the place and cleaned it. Girl brought some leaves and flowers and scattered them here and there. It looked nice.
Here in their neighbourhood, people talked to each other about it. They all were pleased about the couple's decision. They had felt that their friendship had made the place lively and were happy to imagine the couple being together all the time. The friend of girl felt so joyous that she spent the whole day making and decorating a beautiful pot, in which couple will have their first meal together. Eldest lady living next to the boy was making healthy tonic out of the leaves her grandson just brought after two hours of search. Young kids, who looked up to the man for his strength, brought flowers and made beautiful bunches. And then the hysteria spread in the whole area. Everybody was making or bringing something for the couple. Yes it was a grand and joyous occasion.
The day has arrived. Sun rose from East as usual, but looks much brighter. The Blue colour of sky has more shine and trees around seem to be swaying in joy. And not only the couple was wondering at this, but all the invitees also had the similar feeling.
Everybody has reached the place and stood in circle. Couple waited for everybody to come, standing in the middle. Then the man announced the decision and crowd cheered. He winked and asked girl if she agrees with the decision. Girl half smiling and half blushing nodded her head with a silent yes. The crowd cheered again.
They all clapped. Children started moving with the rhythm of claps. Elders watched them . Some more people joined in the dance and people cheered them. Within minutes, everybody was dancing. They forgot all their worries about next days arrangement of food. They forgot that they had a painful winter some days back. They forgot that they had lost their dear ones recently. They were free and dancing.
They were surprised when couple took them to a big container full of fruits and vegetables. They were hungry and felt gratitude to the couple. They all sat together and enjoyed the meal.
Couple could not believe that people love them so much. It was not those things people brought, but their eyes, which made them realise this. They accepted each of the gift with great love and gratitude, as a symbol to remember the love of people.
The couple had a great start of their new life. The evening had made the occasion of grand significance. Yes, this decision for their lives was significant and it deserved this evening and this celebration. Anything lesser would not match the glory of their decision.
The night grew darker and today the stars had extra brightness and moon was competing sun. Yes, they lived happily forever.
The story does not end here. The story multiplies, the event multiplies. People start feeling the need and importance of life partner. More people start living with their soul mates. The event becomes more frequent. Then it becomes and essential part of every body's life. What started with a man and a girl, percolates down to each and every individual, which is called marriage today.
Almost all individuals marry today, may be for different reasons. Every couple invites their well wishers. The flat stone turned into rough paper, then to designer paper, moved to cyber space and has become more visually attractive. For each marriage, there is celebration of such grandeur, that the first couple would have never dreamt of. What started as clapping together and moving in rhythm, has now grown into professional dance preparations. Raw fruits and vegetables have been replaced by endless list of delicacies. Gifts have been transformed from simple leaves, herbs and flowers to cash envelops and brightly wrapped gift items.
But, how many couples today would be as fortunate as that first couple, who got married with simplest of arrangements.
How many couples are fortunate to have the right reason to marry, who do not go for marriage as a social custom, who marry because they feel that it is the best thing to do for their lives. How many couples invite people to share their happiness and not because of social obligation. How many invitations carry warmth of urge to share the joy, beneath costly printing and design. Do the beautiful letters convey the same meaning as the rough drawing on flat stone.
How many people go to marriage functions because they feel great about the occasion, and not to show their faces. How many people feel great to be part of event and do not come for 'Dinner Party'. How many gifts come as outcome of joy within the heart of people and not as a part of custom and social obligation.
How many family members get to enjoy those moments and see the brightness in that day. Or the event passes under the tension of 'making good arrangements' and attention never goes to the feelings, as the mind cannot think beyond series of customs, formalities and rituals.
How many dinners carry sweetness of love and care for guests and not the dryness of a custom being followed over generations. Does the dances and professional arrangements go anywhere near to the natural joyous movements of body, which carries no hesitation or worry about what others will think. Can costly colourful perfumed dresses make the atmosphere as pleasant as a body in old costume spreading fragrance of joy. Does the grand decoration carries a feeling of making others feel good or is just another effort to reinforce the social status.
We have developed better ways to convey the messages and feelings, but it seems that those means and ways have become so important that the underlying essence is totally buried under the weight of customs, traditions, rituals and formalities. That is why the marriage functions are becoming burden for families and formalities for guests. Their importance is lost and that is why their duration is being reduced to minimum possible extent. What used to be fifteen days celebrations some years back is now shrinking to a day event.
How many couples get the feeling that the occasion received the deserved significance from the invited guests. How many gifts touched their hearts. For how many couples, the evening is reflection of a great life ahead and not of a tiring session. For how many young siblings, it does not bring a feeling that court marriages are better.
It is still not late. We still carry the same feelings somewhere inside. Only need is to bring them out. There is need to understand and appreciate the basic theme behind all these customs and traditions. Once the underlying feeling becomes the significant driver of our actions, the outward symbols will automatically start shining. The gift wraps will become heart touching. Food delicacies will reach further down to heart from the palette. Decorations will add to the outpouring joy.
Can we wake up now and bring life to the mechanised system ruled by traditions and rituals? Shall we dare to question the customs and beliefs and go beyond the symbolic representation of feelings. Shall we make the internal joy so overpowering that while gifts exchange hands, feelings touch the hearts. Can we live the Real Grand Life of Love, Care and Joy again, removing the unwanted masks of rituals. YES, WE CAN and WE SHALL.
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